Discovering the Truth!
Have you ever been "told what you should do?" Or, have you ever told an employee, spouse, son or daughter what they should do? How did that strategy work? What kind of resistance and later resentment did you encounter? How much fun was that?
Recently, I had a client make a decision that seemed to be one of the worst decisions they could make and I was so disappointed! The first thing I did was get mad and want to go tell them how stupid they were.
Based on all of my training/experience, I knew my emotional reaction was wrong and miraculously, I stopped and began thinking about the most powerful questions I could ask, with CURIOSITY!
I'm just curious, how did you come to your decision?
Say more about that so I can better understand.
How is this new direction going to work?
What will the outcome be?
How can I be helpful?
I listened the best I could without judgment and encouraged them to do what was best for them and wished them well.
Two days later, they called and told me they had changed their mind. For some reason, I was shocked and then I realized it's always best to ask valuable questions and let others discover their truth. With "their truth," they'll be stoppable!
What about you?
Who are you wanting to CONVINCE and tell them your Answer?
What "curious" questions, without an agenda, could you ask to help them think about what they're thinking about?
What causes you to think your answer is the only/best answer?
How could you let go of the need to have the answer?
The question for me is always..."Do I want to be right or do I want to be effective?"